When the goings get tough, the tough get going. Or something like that. Craig Wright is NOT going out without a fight, ladies and gents.

On Monday, the Kleiman vs Wright trial reached its conclusion. Craight Wright has learned an expensive lesson, it’s not really a great play long-term to lie to the courts. After final play by the plaintiff through which all of Wright’s lies since the case opened came to light, the judge left Wright on the hook to foot the bill.

According to those in attendance, Wright is responsible for the repayment of 50% of the late Dave Kleiman’s IP and Bitcoin mined prior to his death to Kleiman’s family. In professional terms, this represents a metric fuckton of Bitcoin. Based on holdings and IP on December 31, 2013, the odds that Wright can reclaim all that coin he sold in favor of BCH and then BSV at much lower prices is approximately 0%.

The Road to Recovery

Fear not, BSV soldiers! Craig Wright won’t fold to something so minute as a court ruling. Witnesses at the courthouse report that Craig went straight to state offices to register his next venture, “Satoshi Tea LLC”. Early reports suggest that Wright has a secret concoction deemed a panacea for all financial-related illness.

Per the initial documents, Satoshi Tea LLC seeks to incorporate a business model visually similar to the triangle tea bags offered by the company. Partners in Satoshi Tea LLC will be tasked with recruiting salespeople below them, earning a split of the revenue for their team. At the top of the tea bag, of course, is Craig “wow he wasn’t really Satoshi” Nakamoto.

If this tea is truly as great as Craig’s sales team touts on Facebook, this could be the next big thing. Bigger than Bitcoin and blockchain, that’s for certain.

Further reports allege that tea bags will be tracked on the blockchain, and an upcoming ICO for Satoshi Tea Tokens is currently being discussed.

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